Loving the Now
Shiloh Adlar
March 2018
There is a very important message that I learned recently, and that I can sometimes still struggle with. I know I am not the only one who deals with past thoughts, so I thought I would share with you this little secret.
For the longest time, I have dwelt on the past. I have dwelt on past traumas that I’ve experienced as a small child all the way to the accident that took my brother from me. I have blamed myself over and over again, questioning whether anything may have been different if I had only done something different. I have been angry. I have been depressed. I have suffered through many trials due to that. A couple years ago, I had ballet taken away from me because I became so physically ill, and I have had to deal with that as well as continue making sure that my body is strong enough and capable of going back to dance one day.
I find that if I dwell in the past, in these negative thoughts of what if or “I wish things were back the way they were,” I lose out on the present. I begin to miss opportunities that are right in front of me and life becomes very dull. I begin to wonder exactly what I am even doing anymore. What is my purpose in life? All of this because I am trapped in the past.
The past is unable to be changed. As much as I wish Time-Turners were real and I could go and stop the accident from happening, as much as I wish I could go back and tell my brother one last time that I loved him and was sorry, that just isn’t possible. All that does is drag me down. It makes me feel as if I don’t deserve to have a life because his is gone and it’s “my fault.”
So I have learned that I have to accept the past for what it is and look to what I currently have to make the best of it. I may not be able to dance anymore at this current time as much as I want to go back to being in the studio everyday, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t work back up to it. I only need to make sure that my heart is strong enough to handle it, and that takes time.
The more I focus on loving what I have, and even appreciating my past for what it is, and that is to say accepting, learning what I must from it and letting it go, the happier I am overall as a person. The world opens up to me more as well as I let in people and life.
Loving the now is the best decision I was able to make for myself, and I can see that it is giving me a brighter future. I have more love to give others which is a passion of mine, and I can radiate the light I have found inside me to those who are stuck in their own darkness and are searching for a way out.
If you find yourself constantly dwelling on a past event, no matter how big or small, try appreciating it for what it is and allow it to make you stronger rather than drowning in the negative. Our past makes us who we are, but it does not have to define us. We can choose to focus on loving the now and radiating light and love into our own lives to find happiness and fulfillment in our passions and dreams.
There is a very important message that I learned recently, and that I can sometimes still struggle with. I know I am not the only one who deals with past thoughts, so I thought I would share with you this little secret.
For the longest time, I have dwelt on the past. I have dwelt on past traumas that I’ve experienced as a small child all the way to the accident that took my brother from me. I have blamed myself over and over again, questioning whether anything may have been different if I had only done something different. I have been angry. I have been depressed. I have suffered through many trials due to that. A couple years ago, I had ballet taken away from me because I became so physically ill, and I have had to deal with that as well as continue making sure that my body is strong enough and capable of going back to dance one day.
I find that if I dwell in the past, in these negative thoughts of what if or “I wish things were back the way they were,” I lose out on the present. I begin to miss opportunities that are right in front of me and life becomes very dull. I begin to wonder exactly what I am even doing anymore. What is my purpose in life? All of this because I am trapped in the past.
The past is unable to be changed. As much as I wish Time-Turners were real and I could go and stop the accident from happening, as much as I wish I could go back and tell my brother one last time that I loved him and was sorry, that just isn’t possible. All that does is drag me down. It makes me feel as if I don’t deserve to have a life because his is gone and it’s “my fault.”
So I have learned that I have to accept the past for what it is and look to what I currently have to make the best of it. I may not be able to dance anymore at this current time as much as I want to go back to being in the studio everyday, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t work back up to it. I only need to make sure that my heart is strong enough to handle it, and that takes time.
The more I focus on loving what I have, and even appreciating my past for what it is, and that is to say accepting, learning what I must from it and letting it go, the happier I am overall as a person. The world opens up to me more as well as I let in people and life.
Loving the now is the best decision I was able to make for myself, and I can see that it is giving me a brighter future. I have more love to give others which is a passion of mine, and I can radiate the light I have found inside me to those who are stuck in their own darkness and are searching for a way out.
If you find yourself constantly dwelling on a past event, no matter how big or small, try appreciating it for what it is and allow it to make you stronger rather than drowning in the negative. Our past makes us who we are, but it does not have to define us. We can choose to focus on loving the now and radiating light and love into our own lives to find happiness and fulfillment in our passions and dreams.